The Aftermath Of The 2008 Mets Is Worse Than Their Actual Failure
BREAK UP THE CORE
TRADE DAVID WRIGHT
I want to stab myself in the eyes right now. Actually, I rather stab Mike Fatcesa in his massive stomach. Or his smug face. Because of him, I have to hear my dad talk about the necessity of trading David Wright as if having Fatcesa agree with him solidifies his viewpoint. On almost every baseball topic in the past 5 years, we have agreed that Fatcesa is a pompous blowhard who has no goddamn clue what he is talking about. Once Fatcesa agreed with him, my dad should have known he was wrong.
Yes, the answer to the Mets problems is trading their perennial MVP candidate 25-year-old third baseman. Totally logical. He struck out in two crucial ninth innings — he’s obviously an unclutch piece of garbage. One bad week negates four years of consistent production.
This is like the offseason last year with Reyes, only worse. Reyes actually did turn to total shit by the end of last year. Wright OPS’d .993 this September (and 1.034 last September). He’s not the problem. Neither is Reyes. No one is talking about Beltran because he hit a two-run HR in the final game of the season, driving in the only Mets’ runs. Only months earlier seemingly every Mets fan was dissatisfied with his performance.
So fuck all of you crybaby, overreacting Mets fans (and Fatcesa most of all). All three players are some of the best in the game. And the oldest one is still only 31. They are NOT the problem. The playoffs are not guaranteed, no matter how much money you may spend — just look at the other side of town. Sure, the Mets once again choked away a lead in the last 17 games. But if the bullpen weren’t so awful, they would have never been in that position. If Moises Alou, Pedro Martinez, and Orlando Hernandez — all 150-year-old Hispanics — weren’t actually depended on, they wouldn’t have had to use so many AAA ballplayers. If Ryan Church knew how to slide, they just might have had a solid right fielder the entire season. And Luis Castillo is the worst Mets signing since Mo Vaughn.
These are the problems that need to be addressed. And I want Carlos Delgado gone, as his second half is just an elaborate hoax. Go after Mark Teixiera. I don’t care if the Yankees will get into a bidding war with you. He’s one of the best fielding first baseman in the league, and he hit even better than Delgado did in the second half. I don’t think I need to mention the first half.
I don’t know what bullpen help is out there — that’s Omar Minaya’s job. The job he didn’t do last offseason. As for second base, it looks like Daniel Murphy — the one great thing to come out of this lost season — will attempt to fill the slot left by Castillo’s total ineptitude. I wouldn’t begrudge Omar for satiating his Manny fetish and getting him for left field, but I can easily see him resigning with the Dodgers, especially if they manage to get far in the playoffs. But there are plenty of left fielders that can fill that hole. Shit, maybe even sign Fernando Tatis to a one-year deal. Or if you decide to keep Murphy out there, pick up a 2B like Orlando Hudson.
Last thing — the one guy I want for the starting rotation is Derek Lowe. I had him in mind even before I read a post over on MetsBlog that stated exactly the same thing. I need to start getting paid for this shit.
And do your fucking job, Omar.